Dear Bunmi,

It’s been months since my ex and I broke up, but I still think about him every day. I’ve tried moving on, but nothing feels the same. I miss him deeply, and I wonder if I should reach out and tell him how I feel.

Should I risk it, or will I just embarrass myself?

— Confused Lover

Dear Confused Lover,

Missing an ex is completely normal, especially if the relationship was meaningful. However, before you reach out, ask yourself:

❓ Do you miss HIM, or do you miss the idea of him? Sometimes, nostalgia paints a perfect picture of the past, making us forget why things ended.

❓ Has anything changed? If the issues that led to the breakup still exist, getting back together might only reopen old wounds.

❓ Does he miss you too? If your ex has moved on or shown no interest in reconnecting, reaching out could lead to disappointment.

If you truly believe there’s unfinished business, a simple, casual message like “Hey, I hope you’re doing well” won’t hurt. But if you’re seeking closure, remember—sometimes the best way to move forward is to let go.

— Bunmi